a breath of grace. part seven.

well, there was no call on friday. i had to e-mail mr. g and he told me they hadn't given him the green light yet and just to hang in there.

and i heard nothing that weekend. and i kept walking. i kept walking and i kept believing. and i heard nothing on monday. i was getting tired. my heart was torn between extreme faith and thinking that i really might be crazy. on tuesday after school, i was done. i went into my friend, gayla's, classroom and told her how tired i was. i told her that i didn't think anyone stood on this promise with me. i told her i didn't want to walk in the uncertainty anymore and that i wasn't sure how much longer i could wait. and as she gracefully listened and sympathized, mrs. o came over the intercom and said "natalie may, if you are still in the building, could you please come to the office?" i was shocked. i looked at gayla and not thinking clearly said, "oh my gosh! what do i do!?" and in her great wisdom she said, "go!!!!" so i went to that office.

i walked in, mrs. o said nothing but smiled, and dialed a number on the phone. she handed me the phone and i wasn't quite sure which principal was on the other line. i figured out through the voice that it was mr. g and he asked "well miss may, are you busy?" am i busy!? duh i'm not busy- i've been sitting around waiting on this phone call for five days! he told me that he needed to see me at his school. mrs. o gave her sweet blessing and i left, not knowing what was ahead, but believing for the best.

and he offered me that second grade job. i sat in that room and he.. really.. offered me that job. and when i think about that moment, i have a deep breath of grace. He led me there. He wanted me there and He wanted me to have that very job. he gave me my keys and told me i would have my twenty kids in three days.

i saw my classroom with my heart pounding. i said sweet compliments about the walls, windows, all of that just to make conversation. but really, i wanted everyone else to leave me alone in there so i could fall on my face before my God. He's sovereign to the end. to the very end.

to the end of this journey and to the end of every journey in my life.